I've Changed For You

So you met a guy and things are going well between the two of you, things are just peachy keen expect for the fact that he plays video games too much or he's a workaholic. Whatever the case maybe, you perceive his behavior as a problem and since it's a problem in your mind you believe that you can fix or change his ways to your liking. Let me save you sometime and energy, trying to change someone to what you want them to be is an epic fail. People are going around trying to get their Dr. Phil on and using the excuse of I'm trying to change someone for the better, are losing at life.

What really boggles my mind is that folks really think that the person they've decided to enter into a relationship with is going to be willing to change, just because they're now in a relationship with you. First of all you knew before y'all got together that you didn't like the fact he hung out too much in the streets or his mama was nosy, would be in you guy's business all the time and he would listen everything she said like it was the new gospel. You knew all these things from jump street, you pretended like all this didn't bother you but now that y'all are together all of a sudden things/he has to change. Well, I'm saying flag on the play the problem isn't him, its you!  You can't change the rules of the game in the middle of the game. If you started off playing basketball you can't start playing football in the middle of the game, and then get mad at everyone else  because they're confused by you and still want to play basketball.

You can't go around trying to change folks just so they can fit into this mold of the person you want them to be or the one that's in your head. Things don't work that way and it's a complete waste of time trying to do so. Unless that person has some kind of serious problem that is detrimental to their life and to the lives of the people around them. For example they have a drug problem and its to the point that they could be on an episode of AE's Intervention, then by all means help that person and try to change them for the better. Now as I was saying, trying to change your mate's behavior because you don't like it, is a waste of time and maybe you should just find someone else you don't have to change. For one thing did you ever think that this person doesn't want to change or doesn't see the need to do so. As we all know trying to change someone that doesn't want to change never works, ask Whitney Houston's mom she spent half of the 90's doing that and look at what it got her. Also with you doing all this to change someone, the person you're trying to change isn't being the real them. They going to try to be the person you want them to be, but that person isn't the real them. Hence, your relationship is a facade its full of trickery and optical illusions because the other person is trying to be who you want them to be and not who they really are. All I'm trying to say is loving someone compasses loving all of them and taking that person for who they are at face value. It's about taking that person for who they are and not what you want them to be or should be.