Sweet Talk

I've never been good at schmoozing or kissing people's ass .... It's just not in me. I finding it exhausting and quite frankly annoying. I have always been the type to tell people, well let me rephrase that not people in general. It's more like the people I know... how I really feel about things. Back home it's called real talk no flex. I'm not that great at sugar coating things to people over the age of 12. I realized that the same loose lip way I talk with my friends is the same way I talk with people that aren't my friends... well at least to a certain degree. At work I'm definitely not in my real talk no flex mode... I am professional. What I'm trying to get at is I can't talk to certain people in the same manner I talk to my friends. What certain people am I talking about? Well boys, dudes I'm dating. This fact became very apparent over this past weekend.

See the way me and my friends talk amongst ourselves is like the uncut version of Sex & the City or something. It's very raw, real and unfiltered (real talk no flex). Actually I don't talk like this with all my friends, just a certain number of them. Because the other ones... well they just ain't about that life and that's cool.  Everything ain't for everybody. Anyway back to the ones that we talk to each other like we don't like each other... it's just the nature of our relationship. We curse like sailors and drink like fish. We objectify men, it's wild and reckless talk. That's cute for us but I have learnt its not so cute for others especially some the men in our my life. Let me be clear that I'm not going around talking crazy to the guys I'm dating.... I'm not going around telling them they ain't shit but a piece of dick or anything like that. No absolutely not. None of that is  going on. What I'm talking about is not exactly giving them that sweet talk... not putting a filter on my thoughts. Saying things I probably shouldn't be saying to them or I should say but in a nicer way. 

This occurred to me when the guy I'm somewhat dating said I was mean. After I gave him this face 😱 he cleaned up what he said by saying I just say things at times with no thought on how the other person may feel. I just talk with zero fucks given. I never thought about it that way... I'm not saying he was exactly right but he had a point. I can't talk to certain people the same way I talk to my friends... some people can't handle that type of shit. After talking to one of my friends she pointed out with people/men you have stroke their ego and give them that sweet talk. There has to be a balance, you can't always be all brass and sassy. That when I say certain things they (my friends) know I mean no harm and I'm talking shit but others don't always see it that way. Well I certainly see that now after a comment I made got blown way out of proportion by the guy I'm kinda dating. I meant no harm but boy did he take it as a fowl. So know I'm trying to embrace some of that sweet talk and leaving the real talk no flex for my friends.