School Blues

If I only knew what I know now back then…. Maybe I wouldn’t be in the situation I’m in now. Everyone has regrets of some kind and they all vary in degree. Maybe you shouldn’t have spent your rent money buying tickets to the Beyoncé Mrs. Carter tour, doing that tequila shot with all the Jack Daniels you drank was the wrong move, being 16 and pregnant…. These are just some of the regrets a person can have. We all have them, mine lately has been “bitch you should’ve gone to Grad School immediately after Undergrad”. These past few months have been nothing but a damn struggle…  I mean Like D’jango’s wife trying to find the Underground Railroad and getting her Freedom Papers struggle, okay that’s a bit of an exaggeration but my struggle is real. A struggle that I can only think that would’ve been less of a struggle if I attempted to go to Grad school at 22 rather than in my late 20’s. I still would've been laser focused on school but after being out of school for so long I’m about as focused as DMX is about trying to stay out of jail.

The crazy thing is that I’m not even taking a full course load but with this class I’m taking and a full time job. I feel crazy, not sexy or cool… just plain crazy.  School was so much easier when I was in undergrad, it was my main focus. That and getting to the bar before midnight and the $1 tequila sunrises went back to regular price.  Now it’s not just school anymore, its meetings, deadlines, paying bills, and a whole bunch of other shit. It’s having a damn job… pulling all nighters and getting up to go to work at 6am is not what’s up.  When I pulled all nighters in undergrad I just had to get up and go to class, and if I had breaks in between I would go back the dorms and take a nap or sleep in the library. That’s a non-option at work, sleep where?? In the bathroom… yeah okay.  I’m not going to lie its been a little rough going back to school and having a full time job. I got off to a kinda rough start, which wasn’t exactly my fault. That’s another story for another day, however what happened really doesn’t matter because at the end of the day its my name on those grades and nobody else’s…. so there’s that.  I’ve gotten a little better with getting the hang of things lately, but I still feel overwhelmed with school at times. It’s definitely put a damper on my somewhat interesting social life but hey I know it’s for my own good but still I really hate school at times.

I have no idea how people with families (spouses and children) go back to school and work full-time. I’m more stressed out than Roseanne after they announced there wasn’t going to me any more Twinkies produced.  I just have a constant list of things that I need to do and sometimes shit gets done other times it doesn’t. So how a person balances all of this with kids, I'm not sure but I'm sure some type of narcotic is involved. God Bless them and can they pass out some Cliffnotes on how this happens.  

I will say this though the course I’m taking has definitely given me a better understanding of the field I’m in. This aint no fluff course, I feel more knowledgeable about problems that arise at work, so I guess that’s a good thing. I’m not working my ass off and pulling out my hair at times for some useless bs that I’m never going to use in my career. So here’s to looking forward for school being out for summer.

Summer, Summer, Summertime

Well once again boys and girls it's almost that magical time of the year it's SUMMERTIME BITCHES!!! So again I think its imperative that we go over some rules for the summer, as I did last year Because Its Summertime. So here we go.......

1) Tanning- Listen people we may have to break this down by ethnic groups but here we go. People of Caucasian descent please skin burn is real and so is skin cancer, sunscreen is needed at all times. I understand that during the colder months that you may not get the sun you so desperately seek so that as soon as it hits 70 degrees you're outside sunbathing..... I get looking like Casper the Ghost is NOT what's up but looking like this trick isn't neither. Black people just because we're black and have melanin in our skin doesn't mean we shouldn't be using sunscreen skin cancer is real in the battlefield.

2) Bathing Suits- I'm not my ideal weight and I haven't gone to Weight watchers to get my Jennifer Hudson on, really the girl is small as hell now kudos to her. I'm going to wear the correct size swimming suit and not my dream size swimming suit because I'm not that dam delusional.  Some of y'all are out here being a smooth ass size 16 trying to get into a size a 4 bathing suit, ummmmm no madam that's not gonna work. If you didn't get to your special K diet back in January and started on May 1st your ass just may have missed the boat, and that's okay buy and wear your size or cover ups.... its okay. Try again for next summer, shit that's what I'm gonna do size 6 here I come.

3) Swimming Pools- So as I was talking about bathing suits in the previous point..... some of y'all please go buy one point blank period. I've gone to many swimming pools and beaches and have seen too many grown ass people going to these places in in their underwear. Yes, grown woman in bra and panties at the pool and grown men in boxer briefs like they're swimming attire (penises swinging like bats)  like that's what's hot.... well newsflash it isn't. No person that has gone through puberty should be at the pool/beach in undergarments... its just tacky!!! Take your ass to Wal-Mart and get a $20 swimming suit and call it a day. No country for people that swim in their Fruit of the Looms, get the fuck out of here with that. Also people please don't pee in the pool, chlorine or no chlorine that's just nasty!!!

4) Air Conditioner- People with your going to have people at your house or have your cut buddy come through for the late night creep, PLEASE have working AC. Ain't nothing worst than going over someone's house and they have no AC. It's literally the fucking worst thing in life. Please get that shit under control before you invite people over, I don't care how many fans you have  in your house, that shit could be like a windmill factory its not gonna make up for AC. 

5) Day Drinking- This includes day parties, brunches with endless mimosas, happy hours, just what ever the fuck else. I have fallen victim to a few (okay several) endless mimosas brunches myself and these shits will ruin your life. Like real talk no flex drinking during the day will have you drunk as a bitch at 2:00pm on a Sunday.... looking like Lady Gaga, where are my keys? I lost my phone. I've literally gone to endless mimosas brunch at 11:00am and woke up at the end of True Blood (8:55pm) and had no idea how I got home. Now maybe this is an admission that I'm somewhat of a slush, but hell y'all knew that already but I choose to believe and blame it on mimosas and french toast. Listen folks school/work isn't out for summer for us ( well maybe it is if your a teacher or something), drinking like its Friday night on Sunday/Saturday morning or afternoon will have your ass out for the count. I know of what I speak. Drink responsibility....... because it's summertime.

Because Its Summer Time

Since its summertime and there will be a lot activities going on, such as travelling, water parks, and cookouts I will like to take some time out to go over some summertime rules.

1) Feet: Men and women PLEASE if you're going to wear open toes shoes, I encourage you to have you're feet done. Nobody wants to see you're crusty ass little monsters. I implore you to give Maylin $15 and get those things done or be hot all summer and wear Nikes with socks on. I'm not a fan of seeing men's toes, especially if they're not on a beach. But if the spirit moves you to wear sandals please have you're feet done.

2) Bring something: If you've been in invited to a cookout PLEASE bring something or at least offer to do do. Some hotdog buns, pickles, mustard, a winning personality, just something other than yourself or another mouth to feed. Also please don't bring an extra person if not asked to do so. Don't be that person at the cookout to shows up empty handed because please believe people will talk about your ass.

3) Extra food: Also if your at a cookout PLEASE don't be the person that takes enough food home to feed themselves for a whole week. Its just sooo tacky. If the host says yes please that some food home, do not load up your plate like you're saving food for the winter. No lie I was at this cookout and only one person asked if they could take some food home and the host was like cool. The host leaves for a little bit and comes back, guess what? Just about all the food is gone. How did that happen? Well some other people at the cookout saw this one person making a plate and then took it upon themselves to take the rest of the food and the tupperware it was in too. To this day that is top 5 of the most trifling things I've ever seen. Really who does that????

4) Perspiration: Look I know its hot outside, lord knows I know about it being hot. I live in hot ass Georgia but I'm sorry there's not excuse for you to be walking in the mall with pit and crock sweat stains. Maybe you can wear a fabric that's breathes more like ummm cotton, it is the fabric of our lives. Instead of wearing polyester and nylon tops from Rainbow. Carry some deodorant ,wipes or something but nobody wants to see you sweating like a porch swing monkey. Get that sh!t together.

5) Kids: People with children we know school is out but please find something constructive for your children to do other than terrorizing the neighborhood. Put them in summer camp, send them to their grandma's house, just something. I'm tried of seeing random children roaming the streets like cattle in the middle of the day, chasing the ice cream truck, or standing around at the gas station being loud for no damn reason. It's annoying and all I can think about is where are these kid's parents and why are they allowing their kids to be a menace to society.

So that's it, everybody summertime is about fun and being free. So let's all to our best to make it happen without be "that person". So what's some of your summer rules?

The Love You Never Had

Disclaimer: I'm sorry I've been MIA last week was my birthday and I was doing birthday things, so on to the lecture at hand.


I have you ever known or been a person that always looks fondly upon someone and the encounter you guys had. Like the magically summer you spent with the boy down the street or those two great months you spent dating a guy until you realized he had a girlfriend or whatever caused you guys to stop talking. You run this continuous loop of what you guys did and what you guys had. It gets to the point that you start to idealize the situation between the two of you and start to compare everything else you have after it, to what the two of you had. You think that what you had with him has just magical, electric, and some once in a lifetime type of ish. It was just everything!

Well, I'm here to tell you it probably wasn't that great, I'm not trying to diminish what transpired between the two of you. But if it was the best thing since sliced bread, than why didn't it last? Before you stay something like well I moved or he was shipped off to war. The thing is sometimes we have a tendency to make something grander than what it really was because it basically ended before it really even started. It ended before you really got to know that person and vice versa. Things were awesome between the two of you and maybe there was some type of connection between the two of you. Everything was peachy keen because maybe things ended before your sugar turned to sh!t. Therefore basing every other relationship after this "perfect love", is kinda silly because maybe it was never love in the first place.