I'm Bossy

"Sometimes you have to talk bossy to them". This quote was said to me by my best friend at the time in 3rd grade and it still rings true to this day. What she was referring to was this boy in our class, his name I forget and it's really not that important now. All I remember was that we wanted this boy to sharpen our pencils for us while in Art class because well we were lazy and didn't want to walk to the front of the class and do it ourselves. I initially asked him all politely and shit. Guess what he was like yeah no do it yourself. My friend demands he sharpens the pencils, she says something  like " Oh you're going to sharpens these pencils if it's the last thing you do boy". Well we got our pencils sharpen and that's when she turned to me and said the above statement. At the time I thought she was crazy as hell, you can't go around talking to boys all kinds of crazy, they'll be mean to you and steal your fruit roll ups from you. She proceeded to tell me to keep that Pollyanna shit in check and talk to these boys all kinds of reckless because they don't response to nice. That there was a fine line between the two and that you had to know which one to use when the time was right. Yes..... I swear on my dearly departed dog Smokey. That this was the conversation I was having with my friend in our 3rd 4th period art class.

I honestly wish I would've thought about this particular convo a lot more often than have and currently do because my natural Pollyanna approach to certain things hasn't been the most effective approach. Sometimes you actually have to go ham or talk bossy to people for them to actually pay attention and take heed to what your trying to say. Honestly the only person I talk "bossy" to on a regular basis is my brother. Why?? Maybe because I'm older I feel like I have some superiority over him but he's use to my bossy talk now, so its like whatever the fuck to him. However over all that easy breeze cover girl shit only gets you so far. I have definitely noticed that when I straight up cuss someone the fuck out whether its a friend, foe or boyfriend this gets there attention. Its not like I'm sitting around taking people's shit like toilets put I'm generally a non-confrontational person. Like I'll just stop talking to you but I tell what my problem with you and why I'm not talking to you anymore. That's just too much damn energy and I rather pay you dust, than deal with you anymore.

Well this method is ideal for me, there are some people you just gonna have to confront no matter how much you try to.  I just like things to be cool and clam, I don't want any problems. So I'll make excuses, overlook, brush shit off, swallow pride, and bite my tongue a lot of the time to keep the peace. I guess that's why at times I come off as a Pollyanna and like a true southern belle. Just a nice and peachy girl but if ask my brother or folks that really know me they'll tell you I'm not that innocence and sweet. I just don't want leave my little world of Care-A-Lot (to you youngins that's the place the Carebears lived), I just don't no problems. So when someone makes me put dem paws on em... shit it's not pretty. I do have a smart ass mouth but I just don't cuss people out like for real, for real. So when it happens its effective.

I remember one college when I moved off campus me and my roommates/friends became friends with  the guys that lived next to us. They came over to our place like everyday, we never went to there house well.. because it was disgusting. Like I went over there like once and I swear I thought I caught SARS or something. Why do boys live like that?? Okay back to the story... it was the end of the year and my other friend was subletting my room because I was going back to Atlanta for the summer. So I asked your neighbors if they would help us move her in, they were like yeah. Okay cool. Long story short me and her (just me and her) move all her shit into the apartment in my jeep. I mean were riding down the street with her mattress on the roof of my car, with no damn rope securing it to my car. All we had was Ethernet cords, so we're riding down the street with her mattress and box spring loosely attached to my car with Ethernet cords, going like 20 mph, and both of us holding on to this shit with our bare hands. We get to my apartment and these fools are sitting on their and some of them were on my porch drinking steel reserves and smoking. I lost it!!! I mean I went the fuck off... saw red!! I have no idea what I said but all I know is that stuff in my jeep got moved into the house without me touching it and they were scared to talk to me for like a week. To this day one of them still says he's never been cussed out like that before nor since that night. Sometimes you have to talk bossy to them.