Give It Up Turn It Loose

See the thing is that some folks just don’t know their roles in people’s lives. What exactly do I mean by this?  Well a lot of the time people really think that they mean much more to you than they really do. This is not to say that they themselves are about as useful as a used tampon to your life, it just means that they aren’t exactly in your top 5. It’s like when they’re not around it’s not like you’re going around singing Tamia’s Officially missing you. When you see or talk to them it’s cool and when you don’t its cool too. They bring no tangible assets to your life and maybe they did at one point in time but they definitely do not now. The dynamics in the friendship or relationship has change. Hell there may not have ever been any real dynamics so to speak of in the first place.

But to them y’all are like a child and their My Little Buddy doll. Like y’all are Jay-z and Damon Dash circa 2001 in their mind but in reality you guys are like Jay-Z and Damon Dash present day and that My Little Buddy doll has transformed into Chucky. The relationship/friendship fails to exist anymore or has turned into complete and utter shit. Y’all don’t talk on regular basis, y'all pretty much have no idea what’s going on in each other lives, unless it scrolls across your news feed on Facebook. But yet this person ever so often tries to interject themselves into your life. It’s weird and confusing…. doesn’t this person realize y’all ain't that cool.  They’re the kind of person that hears you’re going on a trip with your besties and they tries to invite themselves or get pissed off  that you didn’t invite them. Chile….. we ain't friends that’s why you ain’t going with me to Vegas. Facts are facts and the facts for the most part y’all aren’t FRIENDS!!! You guys are more like strangers pasting each other in the night. For some people that’s a hard pill to swallow, especially if y’all were once tight at some point in life. But people change and things don’t always remain the same. If two people have grown apart that just the facts of life, folks are always so quick to kick a romantic relationship that has grown staler than last year’s bread to the curb. But can’t seem to do the same when it comes to friendships that have degenerated in the same pattern.     

Well I’m here to say it’s okay not to be bff’s with someone anymore because the friendship has changed or is damn near non-existence. There’s no need to be frying today’s fish in last year’s rancid ass fish grease. Let that shit go!!! You don’t have to feel obliged to this person because y’all were friends forever in High School. Well high school is over and idk about everyone else but I’m not the exactly the same person I was in 12^thgrade and that’s not a bad thing. Its growth that’s what is and some people grow with you and some people grow apart from you and that’s OK. It doesn’t make you a bad person because you don’t wanna hang out friends from your past. You can wish them the best in life but you don’t necessarily need to be a part of their life. Now to the friend from way back then that doesn’t get this and feels the need to try to bulldoze their way into people’s lives. Stop this behavior immediately!!! You can make some want to be your friend, even if that person was once your very good friend. Stop trying to guilt trip that person because you didn’t get an evite to their B-day dinner. Take the hints and the clues they’re giving you…. You guys aren’t no longer on the TOP 5 level. All the texting and phone call in the world isn’t gonna change that. That person no longer views you as a valid person in their lives, for whatever reason. The reason maybe be as dumb as you ate the last chicken wing at Applebee’s 7 years ago or it could be major like you slept with her boyfriend. Whatever the reason is all the harassing (yes, I said harassing because at some point if a person isn’t responding to your calls, texts, e-mails, etc. it becomes harassment) isn't gonna make them want to be friends again. Sometimes as Usher said you’ve gotta let shit burn and that includes friendships.  This ain't gonna ever be y'all.

They’re some people in your life that even though you may not talk or see to them every day or even every month but they’re still your friend and y’all catch up and its like nothing ever changed. You pick up where you left off; the friendship connection is still intact. Then you have the other people that I just talked above. The connection is dead and gone and you could talk to them every day to the day you die but that connection is just gone and never coming back like Jodeci. Life isn’t an express train downtown; it’s a long Greyhound bus ride across the country.  They are many stops; people get on and off the bus. Some people get on and only get stay to the next stop, some get on and stay for several stops, and some get on and stay for the whole bus ride. So you have to realize and recognize which people are getting on your bus and when to tell them the next stop is theirs because they may not know and you’ll wind up with an overcrowded bus and no place for important people to sit.